All I Have to Give
by minasraye
Summary: Mina is ready to confess her love to the one woman she wants. But something big is stepping in the way of that. Something she doesn't want to face... [complete]
1. All I Have to Give

All I Have to Give

Mina brushed her long blonde hair out. She wanted to look perfect for today. She felt nervous as hell, but she couldn't shake the excitement that flooded her body. She was finally going to confess the truth to her crush. To the one person she'd dreamed about kissing for almost a year and a half.

Maybe it had to do with the fact that they were guardians of love and war. And that Aphrodite and Aries were also in love with each other. Although they were man and woman, it didn't mean that one under Aphrodite's influence couldn't fall for another woman being guided by Aries, right? Maybe it was the fact that Raye was so beautiful. Her long black hair cascading down her back in ebony elegance, her violet eyes dancing fervently with the fire as she fire-gazed. Maybe it was the way she looked in the miko robes that she wore frequently, being the miko-in-training that she was. Maybe it was the way she was so confident and so perfect. That nothing could faze her, nothing could make her feel ashamed, or silly, or stupid. Maybe it was the way she looked in the senshi uniform that she wore when transformed. Red really was a beautiful color for the miko.

Maybe, just maybe, it had to do with the fact that she got along so well with Raye that it was hard for her to see herself with anyone other than the miko guarded by Aries.

With her hair brushed to perfection, it gleamed under the light, she pulled it up into a high ponytail and moved to her closet. She had to find the perfect outfit. Nothing to forward, but nothing to shy. She needed to be sexy, but nervous. She should be comfortable. She should find the best looking outfit that she had. She moved clothes about until she found a pale tank-top that Raye had given her on Valentine's Day the past year. She hugged it close to her chest before carefully putting it on. It covered her in all the right place, but accented her small chest and dainty waist. Being an active woman meant you had to sacrifice. She'd never have large breasts, but she could do so much. She pulled on a pair of form-fitting blue jeans and walked out of the closet. She looked in the mirror on the back of her door. She wanted to see how she looked, she needed to know that she looked good. This was a big day and she wanted it to be special.

Giving herself a scrutinizing glance, she finally approved when the white cat she called her best friend and guide voiced his opinion. "You look great, Mina-chan. Who's the lucky guy going to be?"

Mina blushed and looked down at him. "It's not a guy, Artemis. I'm... I'm going to tell... tell Raye the truth."

Artemis snuggled around her feet, rubbing her legs affectionately. "I'm glad your finally going to tell her. You can't keep pretending, Mina-chan, you know that, ne?"

"Hai," she nodded, a small smile on her face. "So, I look okay?"

"Hai. You look gorgeous. Go wow her!"

"Thanks Artemis!" Mina cried happily, lifting the cat from the floor to snuggle him quickly. Her only response was a contented purr.

She finally sat him down on her bed, biding him wait for her to return so she could tell him everything about today. She smiled as she headed down the stairs of her quiet home, her black boots in hand.

_88_

Raye looked at the clock. The klutz, Usagi, had yet to break that. It was up on the wall, but she couldn't help thinking she should just put an ofuda or a sutra around Usagi so that nothing she touched would be damaged. Or better yet, one that wouldn't let her touch anything...

Raye grinned wickedly. But then she turned her attention back to the problem at hand. She lusted and longed for Minako for so long, that she had finally given up. Four years was a long time without anything ever happening. She had nearly cried herself to sleep every night thinking that Minako would never be swayed to enjoy the her company as a lover, and not just as a friend.

Well, her friends from school had very kindly set her up with a boy. And he was a nice boy. There was nothing wrong with him and he was very sweet. She was going to be going out with him again thie evening. But she had to get this meeting with Minako out of the way first.

She had dressed in a simple black, sleeveless blouse and her favorite pair of flare leg jeans. She wasn't wearing any shoes, she would slip them on later when she went to meet with Hojo. (I watch Inuyasha! I'm guilty!) Her friends really had a knack for producing boys who were quiet, considerate, and very kind. Raye sighed, she didn't know if that was what she wanted.

She glanced at the clock again. It proclaimed the time as 2:30, when Minako was supposed to show up.

As if on cue, Minako could be heard on the shrine's staircase, huffing and puffing as she ran up them, she was hastily throwing her hair back up into a ponytail and smoothing her clothing, whilst running up the stairs.

"Raye-san!" she shouted, waving her hand over her head. She ran the rest of the stairs and came to a halt before the shrine maiden.

"Konnichiwa, Minako," Raye smiled and bowed slightly to her friend. "Come inside. I've got some great news to tell you!"

"Nani?" Mina asked, cocking her head to the side.

"Come on, I'll tell you inside," Raye said, turning elegantly to flow into the house she shared with her aging ji-chan.

"Now, what was so important that you had to rush me into the house to tell me?" Mina asked playfully, dropping onto Raye's bed.

"Well, you know how Sakura-san and Saya-chan have been trying to get me to go out with somebody? Well, they finally succeeded. I went out last Saturday night with a boy named Minamoto Hojo. And he was so awesome!" Raye finally burst.

She was especially thrilled to be sharing this piece of news with Minako. Wasn't it the blonde who had insisted she try to see men before swearing them off?

While the miko glowed in obvious excitement and happiness, her friend wasn't so thrilled. If Raye was going out with men, that meant that she didn't even want to consider going out with herself. It meant that Raye had finally taken her advice and decided to go out on dates with guys. She cursed herself for ever suggesting it to the ebony-haired woman in the first place.

Trying to let her hurt and disappointment show, she smiled widely and looked her friend in the eye. "I'm so glad for you," she whispered softly. She was trying not to let her hurt show. Trying not to let the tears fill up her eyes. She wanted to smile, she wanted to be happy for Raye, but she just couldn't be. She felt as though her heart had been ripped out, that she was going to fall into a dead faint because of her broken heart.

"Aren't you happy?" Raye asked softly.

"Hai. I'm happy for you Raye-chan. Really. But it's... it's hard to think about somebody else in a relationship when I don't have one anymore. My last one ended badly, ne?" Mina murmured softly. She was glad that she had indeed just come out of a relationship.

She hated the boy who had put her in the relationship, acting as though he had to be in control of her every move and who she was in contact with. He even went so far as to threaten to leave her if she didn't stop hanging out with the girls. Deciding that that wasn't the best relationship to be in, she smiled softly at the boy and told him that he could fuck off and take care of himself. She wasn't a babysitter, she wouldn't be stuck sitting at home waiting for him to allow her to do something. She shook him off and told him she didn't want to be seen with him anymore.

It was also because of this relationship that she found out that she had fallen in love with Raye. She had always wanted to be near the miko in training, always longing for her company. But because it was Raye, because she was a woman, Mina had mistaken the feelings as those of a best friend. She had never really had a best friend before she met the senshi, but now that she did, she would confuse the feelings, she supposed. She had fallen in love with the woman protected by Aries. With Raye.

Pretending that her cell was going off, she picked it out of her pocket and looked at the screen. She made a shocked face and looked up at Raye.

"Raye, I gotta go. My mom sent me a text message with come home, 911 in it. I have to go home and make sure that everything's okay. Gomen ne, I have to go." Mina said as she rose. She bowed to the darker hair girl and walked out of the room, quickly slipping her shoes back on.

She ran down the staircase before the shrine and hopped on the bus. Intent on returning to her home and crying her eyes out to the one creature who had always supported her. No matter what.


	2. All I Have to Give

All I Have to Give

"Oh Artemis! It's awful! Raye-chan is going out with a boy! She's not even going to want to hear what I have to say!" Mina wailed to the white cat curled in her lap.

"Did you admit how you feel? Did you ask her how she felt about the guy?" the wise, often foolish, cat asked softly.

"I didn't even have to ask! She was gushing on and on about how awesome this boy was her friends from the academy had set her up with. The senshi didn't have a problem with her preferred choice, so we never really tried to set her up with anyone," Mina sniffled, wiping a tear from her eyes. "But her friends at school wouldn't hear of it and they convinced her to go out with this boy from the all boy's school. And she was so happy about it!"

"Mina-chan, you have to tell Raye how you feel. If you don't it's only going to hurt you in the end. It's only going to drive you insane. You know that, ne?"

"Hai, I know," she nodded. She tilted her head back, trying to keep the tears from falling anymore. With a sigh, she stretched her arms above her head and laid back on the bed. "Tomorrow, you wanna go with me as I go tell her about her mistake... even though it's my fault she made it?"

"Hai. Of course I will. I'm not your partner for nothing Mina-chan," Artemis smiled. Mina watched as he leaped from her lap and came to sit beside her head. She rolled over and snuggled against him. "Mina-chan, I love you as though you were my own daughter. I can't let you suffer. Especially if I know how to help you fix the problem."

"Arigato Artemis," she whispered softly.

With sharp eyes, Artemis watched as she slowly closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

_88_

"Mina!" Artemis cried in an exasperated tone. It was the fourth time he'd tried to wake her up. To think, she could just go to sleep, in her street clothes, and still sleep like the dead!

"Na... nani?" she yawned, stretching delicately on the bed.

"You want to get up this decade? We're going back to the shrine today, remember?"

"Oh!" she blushed. "I'd almost... I can't believe I was going to oversleep!" she muttered, scratching the back of her neck in embarrassment.

"It's fine. Just, you want to get moving so that we can get this over with today?" Artemis asked, rolling his eyes.

"Hai, hai. I'm going to call Raye and ask if she minds us coming over and then I'm going to take a shower and we can go straight over, ne?"

"Good," he muttered. He leaped gracefully from the bed and walked out of the room, his body swaying with the perfect grace that only felines are capable of.

Rolling her vibrant eyes, Mina rolled out of bed and picked up the communicator on the bed table. "Raye-chan!" she asked as she pressed the button to call up the woman who had stolen her heart.

"Nani Minako?" Raye asked, her face appearing in the communicator.

"Do you mind if I come back over? We didn't exactly get to finish our conversation yesterday," Mina reminded her, a blush covering her cheeks.

"Ano... hold on a sec, let me think I have anything planned today.." Raye murmured. Mina watched as she closed her eyes and appeared to be deep in thought. "Yeah. You can come on over. I don't have anything to do. I'll be happy to see you again. To make sure everything is okay, ne?"

"Arigato Raye-chan!" Mina cried. She blew her a kiss and switched the communicator off. Jumping out of bed, she grabbed an orange and red sundress and clean underwear and ran to take a shower.

She sang in happiness as she moved quickly, trying to get everything taken care of before she left. She dressed and pulled on skin-colored stockings. With her hair pulled up into her usual half-ponytail, she checked her reflection and smiled at herself. She looked happy and ready to take the world by storm.

"I like that dress on you," Artemis commented softly, sitting in the doorway.

"Arigato," Mina murmured, bowing her head to hide her blush.

"Don't be so timid. You have to be more than ready to get what you want. You want love! Remember the goddess Aphrodite never backed down! When she wanted somebody, she went to them and made them hers! You are the goddess in human form! Take the one you want and be happy!" Artemis lectured enthusiastically.

"You practiced that, didn't you?" Mina laughed, kneeling before the feline guardian.

"Hai. I did. But it sounded so good, ne?"

"Hai. It was beautiful. Arigato," she whispered. "Come on, lets go!"

_88_

She got off of the bus and walked slowly to the shrine.

"Artemis, I'm nervous!" she murmured softly.

"Don't be nervous. I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you, ne?"

With a grateful look at the pearly feline, she began the ascent to the shrine. She looked up and saw the shrine maiden standing happily at the top of the staircase, her long black hair danced poetically in the wind.

"Minako!" Raye waved.

"Raye-chan!" Mina responded, running up the stairs. She quickly embraced the shrine maiden and pecked her softly on the cheek.

"What was that for?" Raye asked softly, dazedly as she cocked her head to the left and gently rubbed her cheek.

"Come inside. We have to talk. I have to tell you something."

"Nani?" Raye asked.

She nearly laughed out loud as Mina grabbed her smooth hand and pulled her into the small home. Raye quickly took charge and led the way to her bedroom. When they were in, she slid the door shut and knelt before the small table in her room. She gestured elegantly at Mina and indicated the spot next to her, her traditional spot during the senshi meetings.

"Mina, what's gotten into you?" Raye asked softly.

"Raye-chan... I don't know how to say this..." Mina broke off. She looked down at the impossibly wonderful feline that snuggled against her knees and looked back up, her eyes meeting Raye's. "Raye-chan, I'm in love with you."

_a/n: gomen nasai for the long delay minna! i've been super busy with all kinds of other things and this story that won't leave me alone... -.-' i hope this update helps everyone out, it's not right of me to leave it alone for so long, but i'm afraid i'm only going to be able to update my stories about once a month. i'll try to do more, but school is a pain in the ass and it's hard to find the time i need to write! anyway, enough with my excuse making! now, for some responses..._

_**balticbard**: arigato! the compliments are always nice. here's part of the sequel! as to whether or not she gets a happy ending... have to wait and see, ne? thank you for the review!_

_**whiro**: sorry it's going to be long intervals between my updates! i hope you don't mind too much, but i'm not going to give up! i'm going to keep this story going! it's been in my head for what seems like an eternity, i just have to find the time to get it out... o.O thank you for the review!_

_**ConservErie**: i'm flattered that you enjoy my story so much and i hope you continue to enjoy the characterizations. unfortunately, i've never seen the anime and only know the manga... sad i know... so the characters seem a bit out of character from what i'm used to and i wasn't sure how that would be received. thank you for the review and helping to reassure me!_

_and..._

_**thorn on a rose **(here's the sequel!)   
__**cookie   
**__**fan**_

_thank you all for the reviews! as my first fanfic ever, i'm really excited about the response i've gotten! (glomps everyone) thank you so much!_


	3. All I Have to Give

"Raye-chan, I'm in love with you," Mina said softly. She smiled a small smile at the woman and bowed her head, hiding the embarrassment she felt at the declaration.

"Minako," Raye breathed. "Is… is that what you came to say the other day?"

"Hai," Mina nodded slowly. She could feel the tears dancing in her eyes. The fear that she was about to rejected again tightened her chest, making it hard to breathe. She looked up and met the violet eyes of the one she loved before blinking her own blue eyes. "I… I realized it after I broke up with _him_. I realized how much I hated being away from you. How much I need you Raye."

"Minako, Minako," Raye soothed, embracing the blonde girl beside her. "Artemis, could you leave us alone, onegai?"

"Mina?" he asked, looking up at her.

She nodded and he quickly stood and padded to the shoji. He looked back at the pair before clearing his throat at the shoji. Raye scooted over and slid the shoji open for him. When his tail had disappeared around the corner at the end of the hall, she slid the door shut and scooted back to the vixen that held her heart.

"Mina, why didn't you tell me sooner? Why didn't you tell me when you came over the other day?" Raye asked, her eyes dancing with a strange look.

"You… y-you were so happy as… happy to have a boyfriend," Mina sobbed. She folded her arms on the table and hid her face in their creamy prison.

"Minako, did I ever say that I was in love with him? That he was be my boyfriend?" she asked softly, trying desperately to remember all of the conversation she'd had with the beautiful blonde.

"I don't know," she whimpered. "All I know was how excited you were to be going out with him and that you were so happy about it and… and I felt awful! I love you Raye, I don't want you to be with anybody but me!" she cried desperately.

"Mina, look at me," Raye ordered.

"Nani?" she murmured as she looked into the violet eyes of her desire.

"I love you. I'm only going out with Hojo-san to keep my friends off of my back, they won't hear about me going out with somebody else. They think Hojo-san is perfect for me, but I don't want quiet, I don't want polite, I don't want his constant consideration," she explained.

"Wh-what do you want?"

"I want excitement. I want unpredictable, I want fun, I want to fight with my partner. I want you," Raye murmured.

"You want me?" Minako asked, uncertainty dancing in her tone.

"Since the day I met you. And not as Venus either, although I wanted her, but as Mina-chan. When I met you in your real guise, I wanted you."

"Four years?" Mina asked, awed.

"Hai," Raye nodded. "For four years, I've watched you, wanted you, wanted to tell you the truth, but I couldn't. I couldn't bring myself to say it. I couldn't bring myself to hurt you like that; I wanted you to be happy, even if it wasn't with me. As long as you were happy, you would smile. And as long as I got to see you smiling, I would be okay. I would be able to handle not having you in my arms."

"Raye!" Mina gasped, throwing herself into the miko's arms.

"I love you, my goddess, my beautiful, wonderful, loving goddess."

Mina couldn't think. She could barely breathe anymore. She wasn't going to be rejected, or denied or laughed at or turned away. She was the object of affection for the miko as well. She was going to get her story-book romance, the happy ending she wanted.

"Raye-chan, may I… may I kiss you?" Mina asked with uncertainty coloring her face and dancing in her voice.

"Please," Raye breathed.

Softly, Mina closed the small distance between the two girls and placed the first of many kisses softly on the miko's soft lips.

_And that my dears, is the end. Let's leave Mina-chan with a happy ending, ne? Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing the story,I hope that, even though it was severly delayed by the breaking of my writing hand, you are pleased with the story and that you enjoy it. Please, leave a review and let me know what you think, pleasing or otherwise. This is my first fanfic andI would like to know what I did right (if anything) and what I did wrong. Let me know andI would greatly appreciate it!_

_ja ne!  
minasraye_


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